Ac is getting very possessive of me-- daddy will love on me and say "my mama" and she will try to push him away and say "my mama!!" it's really sweet - makes me feel loved. :-)
Thursday, May 31, 2012
Tuesday, May 29, 2012
5-29-12
Today was a GREAT day! Found out that our new bouncing bundle of joy is another sweet baby girl! Mama and daddy are pleased and proud!! Sister isn't too concerned either way....haha!
This makes preps a lot easier. Need crib, computer desk for the corner with doors, baby book and a few other incidentals but otherwise we are ready! We want them to share a room---it will be good on many levels we hope-
Trying to start thinking of names--Andy heard Gabrielle at a Graduation the other night and liked it. I like it too....will keep working on ideas....
AC is learning and has soo much spunk!! She's learned to say "mine!" as a game with me and her daddy. Not mean or selfishly (although I'm sure that will come) but just playfully--mischievously. She also said "all gone" yesterday. She's started calling Andy "Da mama" instead of daddy so we are working on getting back to da da...
Love my family....so thankful for how the Lord blesses us although we are so undeserving!
This makes preps a lot easier. Need crib, computer desk for the corner with doors, baby book and a few other incidentals but otherwise we are ready! We want them to share a room---it will be good on many levels we hope-
Trying to start thinking of names--Andy heard Gabrielle at a Graduation the other night and liked it. I like it too....will keep working on ideas....
AC is learning and has soo much spunk!! She's learned to say "mine!" as a game with me and her daddy. Not mean or selfishly (although I'm sure that will come) but just playfully--mischievously. She also said "all gone" yesterday. She's started calling Andy "Da mama" instead of daddy so we are working on getting back to da da...
Love my family....so thankful for how the Lord blesses us although we are so undeserving!
Friday, May 25, 2012
5-25-12
My girl got a big girl haircut yesterday--since it's so straight and fine I had Chasidy cut an inch or so off in a long bob--it's ADORABLE but she looks wayyyy too grown up. :-( We are enjoying every minute though!
Last night the baby (cannot WAIT to have a name!!) was the most active they've ever been!! Daddy even got to feel the action for the first time! Yay! It makes this new baby seem like part of the family in a brand new way! Can't wait to meet him/her! Tuesday cannot get here fast enough for the gender ultrasound......only then will Andy talk about names w me! :-)
My weight gain is scaring me a bit---almost nothing and then like three pounds this week---I really, really don't want to gain 45 pounds like last time!! So far I'm almost 20 weeks and have gained seven pounds....but like I said-three pounds this week and I've not been bad!!
Last night the baby (cannot WAIT to have a name!!) was the most active they've ever been!! Daddy even got to feel the action for the first time! Yay! It makes this new baby seem like part of the family in a brand new way! Can't wait to meet him/her! Tuesday cannot get here fast enough for the gender ultrasound......only then will Andy talk about names w me! :-)
My weight gain is scaring me a bit---almost nothing and then like three pounds this week---I really, really don't want to gain 45 pounds like last time!! So far I'm almost 20 weeks and have gained seven pounds....but like I said-three pounds this week and I've not been bad!!
Thursday, May 24, 2012
5-24-12
Precious child is sick tonight. First she only wanted me, but then she threw up and daddy held her through it and now she only wants Daddy---so sweet how she needs us both. Nothing makes you feel more powerless than your child being sick....God heal her quickly please!
Tuesday, May 22, 2012
5-22-12
Who knew that putting the kitchen rugs on the floor in the living room would equal the most exciting afternoon ever to my Anna Claire! She has jumped, bounced, lain all her stuffed toys on one, then another. Busy, happy baby!!!
Tuesday, May 15, 2012
Sunday, May 13, 2012
Mother's Day 2012
Today is my second "real" Mother's Day - I guess you could say third, because I was pregnant on the first, but my little Joy hadn't arrived yet. I've really been struggling with a couple of things, and I want to put them into words, mainly because I tend to purge memories that aren't perfect, or accurate, or beneficial and just focus on the good. I do this subconsciously, and generally, the practice serves me well. I don't remember long past hurts often, can't think of things that have deeply scarred me (for the most part), and just kind of keep to the positive.
But I know one day Anna Claire will likely have babies of her own and I want her to know how her Mama struggled, so that she will know that she is normal. Likely by then I will only remember that I was busy and that time seemed to fly and that life was beautiful. Because, truly, life is beautiful right now. I am beyond blessed and I sense that constantly. It's overwhelming. I don't know if it is pregnancy hormones or the Holy Spirit, or what, but I find myself on the verge on tears often just at the blessedness of this particular time in my life. I have a husband that I enjoy and a daughter that brings me more pleasure than I could ever describe with another bundle of joy on the way.
But even as I recount the joy, I struggle with Mommy Guilt. I hear other moms talk about it, so I know I'm not alone in it. But a lot of them work outside the home and feel like the don't spend enough time with their kids, etc. Since I don't have an outside job (PTL!) I have more than enough one on one time with my baby girl. Yet, I still feel like it's not quality enough. That I'm not taking in every moment to it's fullest degree. That I'm not burning into my memory how precious she is at this fleeting age. In a sense, I feel like I am losing her already and she's just a baby still! It's ridiculous, but I don't want my baby to grow too quickly. I love hte way she loves me. The way she sits with me and strokes my hand, or leg or whatever she can reach. I love hte way that she sucks her baby thumb to calm herself and wants her lovey almost always to relax. I love to watch her grow and learn. I even enjoy teh bits of independence that are developing, although they come with a a pricetag - discipline - because I see HER. I get to peek at the little girl she is becoming. And I love her more than words. As I type, I have to type from memory because my eyes stream just getting these emotions onto paper. I ask myself constantly, "could I enjoy her more?" or "Am I missing out on ANYTHING?" I want to live fully without regrets when this season has passed, because I know that all too soon, it will have passed. I believe I really am trying to take hold and make the most of this time we have together, and I know that I will enjoy her at every stage (hopefully even during the taxing teen years). It's not like I will love her less because she will have become more self-sufficient. I guess that if I'm gut-honest, I'm afraid that she will love me less.
It's nonsense I know - probably even spiritual attack on some minor level to get me down - and most of the time I don't give in to even considering it. But should something happen to me, there are things even now, that I would want Anna Claire to know about me. So she wouldn't feel so alone when she becomes a Mom. God forbid. God preserve me to that day.
Which leads me to the second thing on my mind. Had a bit of a wake up call this weekend. Andy and I have a college friend, Josh Ryals, an extremely talented musician who was renowned for also having a bit of a swagger and a big head. Nice guy though - just had a few idiosyncrasies (sp?) like we all do. He married a sweet girl from BCF also, Leah Hicks a few years back, and they had a son, Jansen, who I think is three years old now. Well, Thursday, while traveling back from visiting family in Texas, she lost control of her car in a rainstorm and hydroplaned - it sent her off the road into the treeline where she was killed on impact. She was like, 27 or so. Just a few years younger than we are. PTL - Jansen is okay. But it has shaken me a bit. Practically speaking, to get life insurance and to be a more cautious driver. At some point my theology comes in though, and I know that God knew that her days were up, and was it not her time, she would have survived. Why it happened and why her life was cut short when her son obviously still needed her, I don't know and those are questions for eternity. But my take-away from this tragedy has been to live more purposefully and to really try to find ways to leave a legacy for my children. I want to be authentic and I want Anna Claire (and the new baby and any future children) to know that Jesus really is all that matters. I struggle with knowing how I should model that. It won't be too much longer and she will become more aware of my practices AND my words. I must be genuine.
But I so pray that God will keep me and sustain me (and Andy too, for that matter) and allow us to raise our children together. I don't want some other woman to hug her and tuck her in - although I know that God would provide, and I would want her to have a surrogate eventually, should something happen to me. But the thought breaks my heart. That's MY baby and I want to raise her. Better not even think on those things...can't do a thing to increase my days and it just makes me upset to consider. (Boy, I'm an emotional basketcase tonight! haha!)
So anyway, back to the happy. I am happy - fulfilled - blessed - overwhelmed with how full our life is. I cannot imagine a woman thinking she has to have a career to be fulfilled. To each their own, but I'm SO VERY GRATEFUL to be able to stay at home and cultivate a home for our little family. There is no greater work that I could do. Thank you, Lord!
I don't know that I feel better, so-to-speak after having purged some of this - I'm bleary and teary and a bit exhausted, but I'm glad to know it's on paper. Things always seem a bit more objective on paper and I can examine them from a distance a bit once I've lain it out there. There is no doubt that pregnancy takes a toll on your hormones! haha!!
But I know one day Anna Claire will likely have babies of her own and I want her to know how her Mama struggled, so that she will know that she is normal. Likely by then I will only remember that I was busy and that time seemed to fly and that life was beautiful. Because, truly, life is beautiful right now. I am beyond blessed and I sense that constantly. It's overwhelming. I don't know if it is pregnancy hormones or the Holy Spirit, or what, but I find myself on the verge on tears often just at the blessedness of this particular time in my life. I have a husband that I enjoy and a daughter that brings me more pleasure than I could ever describe with another bundle of joy on the way.
But even as I recount the joy, I struggle with Mommy Guilt. I hear other moms talk about it, so I know I'm not alone in it. But a lot of them work outside the home and feel like the don't spend enough time with their kids, etc. Since I don't have an outside job (PTL!) I have more than enough one on one time with my baby girl. Yet, I still feel like it's not quality enough. That I'm not taking in every moment to it's fullest degree. That I'm not burning into my memory how precious she is at this fleeting age. In a sense, I feel like I am losing her already and she's just a baby still! It's ridiculous, but I don't want my baby to grow too quickly. I love hte way she loves me. The way she sits with me and strokes my hand, or leg or whatever she can reach. I love hte way that she sucks her baby thumb to calm herself and wants her lovey almost always to relax. I love to watch her grow and learn. I even enjoy teh bits of independence that are developing, although they come with a a pricetag - discipline - because I see HER. I get to peek at the little girl she is becoming. And I love her more than words. As I type, I have to type from memory because my eyes stream just getting these emotions onto paper. I ask myself constantly, "could I enjoy her more?" or "Am I missing out on ANYTHING?" I want to live fully without regrets when this season has passed, because I know that all too soon, it will have passed. I believe I really am trying to take hold and make the most of this time we have together, and I know that I will enjoy her at every stage (hopefully even during the taxing teen years). It's not like I will love her less because she will have become more self-sufficient. I guess that if I'm gut-honest, I'm afraid that she will love me less.
It's nonsense I know - probably even spiritual attack on some minor level to get me down - and most of the time I don't give in to even considering it. But should something happen to me, there are things even now, that I would want Anna Claire to know about me. So she wouldn't feel so alone when she becomes a Mom. God forbid. God preserve me to that day.
Which leads me to the second thing on my mind. Had a bit of a wake up call this weekend. Andy and I have a college friend, Josh Ryals, an extremely talented musician who was renowned for also having a bit of a swagger and a big head. Nice guy though - just had a few idiosyncrasies (sp?) like we all do. He married a sweet girl from BCF also, Leah Hicks a few years back, and they had a son, Jansen, who I think is three years old now. Well, Thursday, while traveling back from visiting family in Texas, she lost control of her car in a rainstorm and hydroplaned - it sent her off the road into the treeline where she was killed on impact. She was like, 27 or so. Just a few years younger than we are. PTL - Jansen is okay. But it has shaken me a bit. Practically speaking, to get life insurance and to be a more cautious driver. At some point my theology comes in though, and I know that God knew that her days were up, and was it not her time, she would have survived. Why it happened and why her life was cut short when her son obviously still needed her, I don't know and those are questions for eternity. But my take-away from this tragedy has been to live more purposefully and to really try to find ways to leave a legacy for my children. I want to be authentic and I want Anna Claire (and the new baby and any future children) to know that Jesus really is all that matters. I struggle with knowing how I should model that. It won't be too much longer and she will become more aware of my practices AND my words. I must be genuine.
But I so pray that God will keep me and sustain me (and Andy too, for that matter) and allow us to raise our children together. I don't want some other woman to hug her and tuck her in - although I know that God would provide, and I would want her to have a surrogate eventually, should something happen to me. But the thought breaks my heart. That's MY baby and I want to raise her. Better not even think on those things...can't do a thing to increase my days and it just makes me upset to consider. (Boy, I'm an emotional basketcase tonight! haha!)
So anyway, back to the happy. I am happy - fulfilled - blessed - overwhelmed with how full our life is. I cannot imagine a woman thinking she has to have a career to be fulfilled. To each their own, but I'm SO VERY GRATEFUL to be able to stay at home and cultivate a home for our little family. There is no greater work that I could do. Thank you, Lord!
I don't know that I feel better, so-to-speak after having purged some of this - I'm bleary and teary and a bit exhausted, but I'm glad to know it's on paper. Things always seem a bit more objective on paper and I can examine them from a distance a bit once I've lain it out there. There is no doubt that pregnancy takes a toll on your hormones! haha!!
Saturday, May 12, 2012
5-12-12
Man, oh, man - how time is flying!! Anna Claire is growing by leaps
and bounds and learning SO much every day it seems! I feel like I'm
losing my "baby" and getting a toddler! She's the busiest little person
I've ever known - into everything and ready to learn about everything
she comes into contact with!
This past weekend Mom came over to visit ("Nana") and we had a great time together. I don't think that there is anyone in the WORLD more precious to her than our little Anna Claire! They are two peas in a pod when they are together. Andy was swimming with Anna Claire (her favorite pastime right now) and when Nana came in, she immediately wanted out and RAN straight up to her!! Of course, Nana didn't hesitate to pick her up - sopping wet naked body and all!!
This weekend Andy's grandparents came to visit. We've cooked like crazy and it's been fun lounging around with them. Papa is 74, but just recently he has started to really play the "old card" and act like he can't do anything except sleep and watch TV. We think he's being a bit obstinate. :)
Anna Claire really has taken to MaMa Betty though. I know that they both probably are exhausted by her exuberance, but they do well with her. Especially MaMa. She's sweet to Anna Claire and I don't think she wanted to leave her today. :(
So many funny little things that she is doing -
She will accidentally trip or fall down (not hurting herself), then fake cry to MaMa to get sympathy (her Daddy and I know when she's playacting and when she's really hurt! haha!) ....then she will go back to the same spot and reenact the event over again!
Counting off before something exciting happens....before she jumps off something, expects to get tickled, etc. Her counting sounds like this usually, "Two, oh, fee!"....but this weekend it's been more like "Two, ohhhhhhhh.......TWO!" Adorable!
She loved MaMa and Papa's air mattress and wouldn't stay off it! Jumping on it every time she could get away with it!
She's beginning the early signs of potty training, which I'm a bit scared of, frankly. She will immediately pat her diaper when she has gone and wants it changed. With Andy, she will even lay herself down on the ground and throw her legs in the air!! Not telling us beforehand yet though....not sure how all this will work!
Phillip Hunter calls her "Miss Bethel" because she is so sociable with everyone and LOVES the attention she gets every time we are there....especially on Wednesday nights at the family meal! She eats and then she's ready to get down and run around and say hello to everyone. Some of her very favorite people are Phillip and Janet Hunter, Cathy Massey, McKenzie Woodham, Kevin Brannon, and Sue McNeal - although she isn't picky - she'll smile at anyone who will talk to her! She's DEFINITELY the "church baby!"
She's starting to fight sleep. She'll be exhausted, but when I pick her up to carry her to bed she will just WAIL until I lay her down. Then she's done. Immediately. Still sleeping all night, going to bed between nine and ten and sleeping until around 7:30-8:30. Great sleeper. One 3 hour-ish nap around 1:30 or so.
She's saying more words and DEFINITELY communicating more, even without "real" words. She's saying "side" for outside or patting on the door, she calls Brobee (from Yo Gabba Gabba) "BroBo", she says "ah" for again (for when her Netflix show goes off....I try to encourage her to say "again" but she probably figures that "ah" works perfectly well, why bother!) When she wants something, and you repeat it to clarify with her she will "dance" (go from one foot to another really fast) or do a high pitched giggle to let you know that, yes, that's what she wants. VERY communicative, even if she isn't speaking a great deal yet.
She has noticed the moon, although she isn't saying moon yet.
She points to show you everything!
She expects to shower with Andy every time he takes one and if she's not allowed to, then it BREAKS. HER. HEART.
Yo Gabba Gabba and Sesame Street are still her favorite shows.
She's getting hurt a lot more often now that she is so active. Hate to see it, but I know it's a fact of life when she's this busy! Cut her foot yesterday and it bled like crazy. :( Two weeks ago, I took her a small brunch at church and she fell and busted her lip, then another child bit her and busted her BOTTOM lip, then she got into Ants that night at the ballfield, and then another slightly younger child threw a softball at her and hit her in the mouth where both lips were busted....all in ONE DAY!!!
She's absolutely beautiful though. Sweet soft face - and I so love to rub along her hair and jawline when she's relaxing next to me watching Yo Gabba Gabba or Sesame Street. Her hair is fine and straight like her Daddy's - not a touch of my unruly waves. I think that her forehand/eyes/brows/bridge of her nose look like her Daddy, but I think she has the bottom half of my face. Unsure about the nose. She's short legged, but so are both of her parents! She's very long-waisted, and that has to be from Andy. Her hands look like mine, and the shape of her feet is definitely Thacker, although I'm not positive about her toes.....they look a bit different than mine...
She could not bring us more joy. We love her more than words can describe. I absolutely dread the days that she thinks I'm infringing on her, or that I'm not cool enough for her, or that I don't love her if I don't let her have her way. I pray constantly that God himself will work in her heart, even beginning now, to give her a great love for Him and that we will have wisdom in parenting. It's an overwhelming task - to be responsible for her little life. All I want - more than success in school, or talents or career, or even a husband and family is that she love Jesus wholeheartedly and sell out to His will for her life. Everything else will fall into place. But how do you cultivate that love? Nurture that self-discipline to seek Him first? I know in my heart that it must be modeled, but I just hope that it's enough. You see good parents with wayward children, and I cannot imagine the heartbreak those parents must daily experience. God protect us - protect our sweet daughter! Truly, our precious gift from the Lord! (James 1:7)
Oh and she can say "bravo!" and clap!! Hasn't figured out exactly when it is appropriate....sometimes she breaks out after a person sneezes!! Haha!!!
This past weekend Mom came over to visit ("Nana") and we had a great time together. I don't think that there is anyone in the WORLD more precious to her than our little Anna Claire! They are two peas in a pod when they are together. Andy was swimming with Anna Claire (her favorite pastime right now) and when Nana came in, she immediately wanted out and RAN straight up to her!! Of course, Nana didn't hesitate to pick her up - sopping wet naked body and all!!
This weekend Andy's grandparents came to visit. We've cooked like crazy and it's been fun lounging around with them. Papa is 74, but just recently he has started to really play the "old card" and act like he can't do anything except sleep and watch TV. We think he's being a bit obstinate. :)
Anna Claire really has taken to MaMa Betty though. I know that they both probably are exhausted by her exuberance, but they do well with her. Especially MaMa. She's sweet to Anna Claire and I don't think she wanted to leave her today. :(
So many funny little things that she is doing -
She will accidentally trip or fall down (not hurting herself), then fake cry to MaMa to get sympathy (her Daddy and I know when she's playacting and when she's really hurt! haha!) ....then she will go back to the same spot and reenact the event over again!
Counting off before something exciting happens....before she jumps off something, expects to get tickled, etc. Her counting sounds like this usually, "Two, oh, fee!"....but this weekend it's been more like "Two, ohhhhhhhh.......TWO!" Adorable!
She loved MaMa and Papa's air mattress and wouldn't stay off it! Jumping on it every time she could get away with it!
She's beginning the early signs of potty training, which I'm a bit scared of, frankly. She will immediately pat her diaper when she has gone and wants it changed. With Andy, she will even lay herself down on the ground and throw her legs in the air!! Not telling us beforehand yet though....not sure how all this will work!
Phillip Hunter calls her "Miss Bethel" because she is so sociable with everyone and LOVES the attention she gets every time we are there....especially on Wednesday nights at the family meal! She eats and then she's ready to get down and run around and say hello to everyone. Some of her very favorite people are Phillip and Janet Hunter, Cathy Massey, McKenzie Woodham, Kevin Brannon, and Sue McNeal - although she isn't picky - she'll smile at anyone who will talk to her! She's DEFINITELY the "church baby!"
She's starting to fight sleep. She'll be exhausted, but when I pick her up to carry her to bed she will just WAIL until I lay her down. Then she's done. Immediately. Still sleeping all night, going to bed between nine and ten and sleeping until around 7:30-8:30. Great sleeper. One 3 hour-ish nap around 1:30 or so.
She's saying more words and DEFINITELY communicating more, even without "real" words. She's saying "side" for outside or patting on the door, she calls Brobee (from Yo Gabba Gabba) "BroBo", she says "ah" for again (for when her Netflix show goes off....I try to encourage her to say "again" but she probably figures that "ah" works perfectly well, why bother!) When she wants something, and you repeat it to clarify with her she will "dance" (go from one foot to another really fast) or do a high pitched giggle to let you know that, yes, that's what she wants. VERY communicative, even if she isn't speaking a great deal yet.
She has noticed the moon, although she isn't saying moon yet.
She points to show you everything!
She expects to shower with Andy every time he takes one and if she's not allowed to, then it BREAKS. HER. HEART.
Yo Gabba Gabba and Sesame Street are still her favorite shows.
She's getting hurt a lot more often now that she is so active. Hate to see it, but I know it's a fact of life when she's this busy! Cut her foot yesterday and it bled like crazy. :( Two weeks ago, I took her a small brunch at church and she fell and busted her lip, then another child bit her and busted her BOTTOM lip, then she got into Ants that night at the ballfield, and then another slightly younger child threw a softball at her and hit her in the mouth where both lips were busted....all in ONE DAY!!!
She's absolutely beautiful though. Sweet soft face - and I so love to rub along her hair and jawline when she's relaxing next to me watching Yo Gabba Gabba or Sesame Street. Her hair is fine and straight like her Daddy's - not a touch of my unruly waves. I think that her forehand/eyes/brows/bridge of her nose look like her Daddy, but I think she has the bottom half of my face. Unsure about the nose. She's short legged, but so are both of her parents! She's very long-waisted, and that has to be from Andy. Her hands look like mine, and the shape of her feet is definitely Thacker, although I'm not positive about her toes.....they look a bit different than mine...
She could not bring us more joy. We love her more than words can describe. I absolutely dread the days that she thinks I'm infringing on her, or that I'm not cool enough for her, or that I don't love her if I don't let her have her way. I pray constantly that God himself will work in her heart, even beginning now, to give her a great love for Him and that we will have wisdom in parenting. It's an overwhelming task - to be responsible for her little life. All I want - more than success in school, or talents or career, or even a husband and family is that she love Jesus wholeheartedly and sell out to His will for her life. Everything else will fall into place. But how do you cultivate that love? Nurture that self-discipline to seek Him first? I know in my heart that it must be modeled, but I just hope that it's enough. You see good parents with wayward children, and I cannot imagine the heartbreak those parents must daily experience. God protect us - protect our sweet daughter! Truly, our precious gift from the Lord! (James 1:7)
Oh and she can say "bravo!" and clap!! Hasn't figured out exactly when it is appropriate....sometimes she breaks out after a person sneezes!! Haha!!!
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