Teenage romance.....boy am I glad that I am past that and happily married!! (imported from Myspace)

Okay, this blog is for Rhonda. I find myself in a better state of mind after I write these ramblings, regardless of whether they have a point or not. Isn't that strange?
Had some stress the past few days over a couple of people that I really care about. They've been together for quite some time (for teenagers) and things have kind of hit a rough spell. You know, really I don't care whether they get back together or not - that isn't my business. But I do care about their individual well-being and when they are hurting, it hurts me. It does remind me though how much they (not just these two, but all teens) are learning about building relationships and how to interact in a romantic relationship. You know, a lot of bad habits can be formed during those years. I see some of them doing things that are not good for them and will not lead them to any success in real, intimate relationships. Some of it is just kid stuff, but some of it is habitual and unhealthy. For instance: perfect example - I see the girs, many of whom have not been raised in a happy two-parent household, try so hard to be a dictator in a relationship. They think it is cute to make the guy do whatever they want. Gives them a feeling of control. Then they think that if the guy doesn't want to, or won't, that they don't care about her. Stupid reasoning. I mean, we had one guy put salt in a cut on his arm. Talk about retarded. Retarded for whoever asked and retarded for whoever did it. That is not the stuff of good relationships. I make you look stupid for my pleasure. Additionally, I really believe in equality of the sexes, however, I fully support the biblical view of gender roles. I believe that my makeup is totally different from Andy's, which lends itself to my desiring to make a home and care for my family. Probably has something to do with my slight lack of ambition. Now, that is just me. But I think that most, if not all, women and men have some predisposition towards the traditional gender roles.....even in teenagehood. Christian girls need to learn to be responders - to let the guy learn to lead. Not to try to control everything (even though that is our tendency at times) and also to learn to actively care for others over ourselves. But it is a two-way street. But there is harmony where there is obedience to God's commands and plan. Guys must learn to treat girls like they are cherished, to learn to take responsibility for the people that they care for and to learn to lead others into a deeper relationship with Christ.
I do not desire these teenagers to rush to be adults right now. I'm not wanting (or expecting) them to make adult decisions. They won't. They are going to chase the opposite sex and go after stupid people and do all the things that I did. Those mistakes are normal. But as they start to develop and become involved on a one-on-one basis, I wish that they would set out to view this person as a potential life partner. I mean, isn't that the point of dating? I mean, if you just want to go have fun - GO HAVE FUN! It's much more fun not having to answer to one person if fun is the goal. But if the ultimate goal is lifelong companionship, then we should approach this whole thing differently. And part of the blame is on society in general.
Now I move to my soapbox......ahem.....how can teenagers make good decisions? Well, one part is by not starting to date at 11 YEARS OLD. What is up with this? What are their parents smoking? I mean, there is NOTHING positive that is going to come from one-on-one dating at that age. And you know what......almost every kid in our group started young like that. They are children then, and children do not need to have the cares and concerns associated with dating for several more years. Additionally, since I am a youth pastor's wife, and since I hope that our kids are Christians (there are many that I am praying for), I cannot stress enough the value of dating like-minded people. And I was guilty of this when I was very young - saying, "well, he goes to church" and what that really translated to was that he went on major church holidays and when his grandma was in town. Unacceptable. It obviously didn't kill me, but it is peculiar that I have NO positive memories from those people and my relationships with them. I try to explain to my girls that you never know when you are going to fall in love so you must set standards high. You must not allow people to have full access to your heart that are not potentially good husbands/wives. And potentially good husbands and looking for potentially good wives. I never cease to be amazed by one person that I know and care about. Good girl. I like her a lot. But she has kind of dove headlong off the deep end and took up the whole party scene. That's fine - her life, not mine......BUT.......she still wants the whole godly, romantic, loving husband to come along and sweep her off her feet. Great expectation, but why is she looking in the gutter. AND doesn't she understand that that godly husband-to-be won't be looking in the gutter either?? Makes no sense. And I care about this person. I long for her to find happiness and contentedness and to stop running from whatever it is that she is running from.
So that is my diatribe. I hope that my friends work out their issues. I want them to be happy, whether that is together or not is up to them. I will love them either way. But if they are going to be together, then I hope that they will start this thing off on the right foot, recognizing that neither are perfect and that some changes need to be made from how this thing was going previously. Some equality needs to be restored.
Whew....I feel better. Now, if they could.....

Celebrity look-a-like cannot be posted by Rhonda.....::sigh:: (imported from Myspace)

Okay, I wanted to post this super cute Celebrity Look-a-Like thing, but alas, it is not meant to be. Even the brilliant Kristin was unable to educate me properly. Thought it would be easy.....unfortunately it was not. Anyway, it a nice idea.
Sorry for those who looked at defunct blog #1 from today.....Andy was rushing me so I accidentally posted it and now it won't let me look at my blog. Hope that it fixes itself.
Made my first Tarheel Pie tonight. It makes a cool chocolate "crust" on top. I hadn't seen anything like it before (you can tell that I don't bake often...) It is for my boss' birthday party tomorrow.
Wish me luck....tomorrow I am going to mediation with my boss and a divorce client. However, it at my old office with my old co-workers. I always feel a little insecure when I see them. I guess because my previous boss was such a jerk I let that affect my self-esteem. So I will definitely be dressing well tomorrow!! If you look good you should feel good, right? Not that it matters. Those guys all think they are the cat's meow so they probably won't notice that I am there - which is for the best......but I will need to be all smiles, nonetheless. Put on a happy (and confident!) face.....At least I know my new boss likes me......that helps. (Plus he beat one of these other lawyers up when they were kids! haha. j/k)
I was prophesied over yesterday. Weird experience. I am such a skeptic, being raised Southern Baptist and all. I don't doubt that God CAN speak through other people to me directly, I just don't necessarily see the need - I mean, he can talk to me directly, so why the interloper? But this lady asked if she could prophesy to me, so what the heck? It is funny to me that I have never been prophesied over in my life and then it happens twice in three months. Boy, our clientele at work never ceases to amaze me! Yes - this happened at work!! But this lady is a good woman and what she said was true of me, so I am going to leave it at that and ponder these things in my heart.....
Ordered dance shoes today. So excited! Thankfully they do not look like dance shoes, so that will be cool. They will be so much more comfortable and should help me tremendously in some of the steps. We missed our dance lesson on Tuesday - Andy had way too much homework. Such is life with a full-time job and 17 credit hours this semester.
Had a phenomenal meal with my friend Kim tonght. Andy grilled some country-style ribs that Kim marinated. She made baked beans (not canned like mine) and potato salad (which I hate, but love hers - go figure). I ate enough for three people and I wonder why I can't shed the pounds. And to think I fancy myself a logical being.....
Oh, a huge party at Rhonda's house - we bought Season Seven of Star Trek: The Next Generation. This completes our collection. I am so pumped! So for the next couple of weeks (or less) we will be watching every night. (yes, me and hubby are dorks - but at least we are COMPATIBLE dorks!!)
Otherwise, all is well. Love to all. I think I am going to go buy another Donald Miller book and watch some Star Trek.

Why does pizza always make me feel fat? (imported from Myspace)

Okay, so, I go to Pizza Hut like once a month. Why is it that every time I go I come away feeling ten pounds heavier?? Of course, it couldn't have anything to do with the fact that I visit the bar multiple times. When will power is "on" I do not eat pizza, mainly because I can't stop. My girls at my bible study can vouch for this. I have not always been like this, but since me and Andy got married, I LOVE pizza. Maybe because when we first got married and were BROKE we would sometimes "splurge" and get a $4.69 Hungry Howie's pizza on Wednesdays. Those were special times..... :) Anyway, didn't blog to write about pizza, but I ate there today with my 2nd mom/friend Kim and ate enough for both of us. It's pathetic. What makes it even worse is that I have been attempting to watch what I eat and limit my portions!! AARGH! Ah, well, back on the wagon tomorrow.
I got an email from Leah - my all-time best friend. We are both terrible at keeping up with each other, so I was really excited. I had emailed her a couple of days ago, and got a new email today. Woo hoo!
Something else that was important to me that happened recently is that I wrote notes to two separate people that I feel (and have felt for a while) that I had wronged. My personality doesn't lend itself to excessive guilt and I am extremely good at rationalizing situations to my benefit. (I am not excusing this behavior, however.) This is one of my personality flaws. We had revival a couple of weeks ago and God convicted me that I had unfinished business with these two folks, so I FINALLY got around to writing to them. I hope that they both understand that I am sorry for the hurt I may have caused them. Regardless, I do feel better having apologized. I definitely feel more at peace having attempted to make things right. That's a good thing in itself.....

DC - here we come! (imported from Myspace)

Woo hoo!! We just booked our first "real" trip by ourselves since our honeymoon! We went to Montana last year with the grandparents, but they handled everything and made all the arrangements. I just finished booking our Thanksgiving trip to Washington DC. I am so pumped!
Not to mention that we are spending a few days in Gulf Shores with my aunt and her family in October. What a great year-ending. Survive September - then I visit Jax first weekend in October, go to Gulf Shores second weekend in October. Three/four weeks pass then we fly to Washington! Yeah!
By the way, we will figure out how good I am at this travel agent thing when we get there. I always have an inside fear that I will pick a nasty hotel - which hasn't happened, and I don't think it will this time either, but I am always scared of that.....
Woo hoo!!

Happiness is having Olive Garden in Dothan.... (imported from Myspace)

Happiness is having Olive Garden in Dothan. Woo hoo!! My wonderful husband calls me out of the blue today and asks me to meet him and a friend for lunch. It was good. I didn't realize how much better their spaghetti is WITH meatballs versus without. Makes a huge difference. (Cher needs to disregard this blog.....as do I, but my will power is lacking at present) So we proceeded to enjoy our SECOND dining experience at the new Olive Garden. I am so pleased. When we moved here we said that Dothan was missing two major things - a Target and ANY kind of decent italian joint. Well, Olive Garden opened on the 28th and Target opens in the spring. Yeah! So now we can move on to the smaller, more cultural wishes.....
Andy bought Microsoft Money 2007 for me. Now I can upgrade from 2004. I wonder if this will create more money for me to work with.....
Had an interesting morning at preliminary hearings with our new robbery client. He has three charges and says he is innocent. My boss believes him, and he really does seem like a nice, decent fellow. But the evidence looks kind of yuck. There isn't much that I hate like I hate not knowing if our clients are guilty or not. We also got a chance to talk with our client's wife, a cute-as-a-button little white girl (our client is black and about 30 years old) who is having a tremendously difficult time kicking her drug habit. She has a horrendous past, but has really come out of all that now, but is having a hard time breaking this last habit. She's kicked all the "hard" stuff - but living alone in "crack rock city" (as Pat calls it) doesn't help her maintain discipline. She is just pitiful. Very sweet mostly, but very very independent - too independent really - she doesn't see that she needs a little helping along. (Just like we all did at 19 years old). She can be very stubborn . Please pray for her. Pat was wonderful with her, he was able to talk with her about her hangups from the standpoint of someone who has fought some of those battles. I was so glad, because I was starting to fume. Since I haven't been where she is - haven't even been close - I just want to say, "get it together! Go get a GED and get in school, how hard is that when you don't work and the government will give you Pell grants all day long!!" Need to pray for patience with her....I have real issues with non-working healthy people who aren't in school. I hate supporting society.
On another note...
Latin dance class was FUN on Tuesday night. What was great is that since this is our second set of classes, we have learned how to stand and where your arms go and so forth - so now we can actually focus on learning the steps. It was fun. We started learning the rumba. I need some shoes though......
Looking forward to the weekend. We may go to a football game tonight, not sure yet though. Andy and I are both totally exhausted and need to have some "down time." Also, my house is disgusting - I would be mortified if any of you were to see it. I will rectify that situation tonight probably as well.
If anyone is actually reading this, so sorry. Consider this the droll ramblings of a person extremely ready to start the weekend.

Latin Dance.... (imported from Myspace)

I am wearing a red shirt and a clip with a red rose on it in my hair today. This is purely to celebrate that we start taking latin dance classes tonight! Woo hoo! I didn't think we were going to be able to take any ballroom this semester, but we are! Wish us luck. Andy did great leading in the intro class, but I think latin will be a whole new animal. I am excited! Now we just have to make time to practice so we can actually go to a dance!
Watched Elizabethtown this weekend. I am still rolling it around in my head, trying to decide what I think about it. I enjoyed it, but it was a very unusual movie. I know I like it, but it challenges me to contemplate anew the value of the "simple life." This has been a theme in my thoughts for a good while now. I think that a couple of keys to happiness (other than a deep, abiding relationship with Christ) are contentedness and simplicity......Simple pleasures. Being excited over the little things. Andy laughs at me for this. I just figure that the little things come a lot more often than the big things and I don't want to have to wait for the big things to get excited! Anyway - if you haven't seen Elizabethtown, see it! And if you have, let me know what your thoughts are on it.
Also watched Must Love Dogs this weekend.....disappointment. Not recommended. I know a lot of people liked it, but I didn't.
I am exhausted after a three-day weekend. What is wrong with this picture? Andy's grandparents were in town, which I enjoyed, but I am so drained from having company. Then we ran around town all day yesterday with folks. Fun, but tiring. I need another weekend! :)

Onward and upward... (imported from Myspace)

So here we are, another year spent and the 7th graders are moving up (or taking over, whichever way you want to look at it! :) ) For those non-Cowarts friends of mine, our group is mid-size, usually running around twenty/twenty-five. We had thirty-four Wednesday night! Yeah! Considering we started with about ten, that's great! I am so pleased. But last night we had a get-together with the 7th graders coming up and boy - they terrify me. It has been a LONG time since I was that age and I confess that I do not remember ever being that loud. Oh, my. But it is fun all the same. I just hope that they will mesh and blend into our group and not create two separate cliques: the older and the younger. I want to prevent that at all costs. I consider the "family" atmosphere something unique about our group. I have loved that about them for a long time. But I don't want our growth, and the growing up of some of our kids to alter that oneness. This is something I am praying about long term.
Something else that has been on my mind lately has been a reminder of a lesson I first grasped when I read "Fresh Wind, Fresh Fire" by Jim Cymbala from the Brooklyn Tabernacle in NY - NOTHING I can do can draw people to God. The Holy Spirit does all drawing the drawing work, so prayer is the key. I need to remember that I can do nothing apart from the vine - I am just a branch. Andy is just a branch. Even if you throw a bunch of money at your youth ministry and attract a huge number, the real lasting change will come from God and him drawing these kids to himself. That is the kicker. That is what I need to be reminded of when I get a little jealous of the resources that other churches offer, or down about our lack of funds. I want God to do His work in this arena. I need to spend much more time dedicating myself to prayer - and even fasting - about this issue. Not only that, I need to be impressing on my students that their prayers make a difference in their friends' lives in the same way.
Andy's grandparents are coming this weekend. Yeah! But my house isn't clean still, oh well. Only so much time in the day, and most of my time is spoken for.
McDonald's went up on their prices today. My $3.43 breakfast meal is now $3.54. Cost of living rises, but Rhonda gets no cost of living raise.....::sigh::
Andy and I had a wonderful lunch together today. Tried a new little homegrown place called "Mildred's Restaurant & Tea Room." Great! Andy is really unique among guys in that he LIKES these little girly atmospheric joints! He enjoys going somewhere that is nice and has nice food even if it is a little pricier than average. I love that about him. We did the coolest things when we were dating as teenagers. Our friends would go to Burger King and a movie and we were going to the Alhambra Dinner Theater and eating at the Sea Turtle Inn. It was great. But we miss a lot of that living in Dothan. It's an hour and a half to any city of good size - Tallahassee, Montgomery or Panama City. Three hours to any big city - Atlanta, Birmingham, or Jax. Guess it makes it all the more special when we get to do it.